Have you as a wife found yourself battling many issues you wished you could get help with? Maybe you need help with understanding how to keep up with your house work when you have a regular 9 to 5 job too. Maybe you need to learn how to sew or need advice on natural birth control alternatives. Maybe you need to learn how not to talk back to your husband even when you know he is wrong and you are right. Maybe you need to know how not to resent your husband for not helping you around the house as much as you would like him to. Or maybe you are just frustrated with the amount of time he has to devote to the church instead of with you.
All these are important issues that you FIRST should pray about and then, of course, speak to your husband about. My trials and tribulations have taught me that when I follow protocol and respect the chain of command, the Most High gives me the true help I need. (Matthew 6:33).
In the words of our brother Paul, “I speak this by permission, and not of commandment” (I Corinthians 7:6), if you feel you need womanly help, ask your husband FIRST if it’s OK for you to seek help from another sister and let him know what you are needing help with. Ask him if there is a sister he prefers you to speak with or if he lets you choose the sister, hopefully you will pick someone that is discrete, whom you can confide in and can offer you the knowledge, wisdom and understanding from the scriptures about the womanly issues you are struggling with (Ecclesiasticus 6:36 [Apocrypha]).
This protocol keeps your husband aware of what is being spoken about and gives him the chance to ask permission from the sister’s husband if it’s OK that you speak with her for guidance. I have learned that this method helps to control any out-of-order conversations and, more importantly, shows a humble respect for your husband and his household. Things done decently and in order always produce righteous outcomes (I Corinthians 14:40).
The scriptures teach us that it is good to have ONE counseller and not just talk to anyone who will hear, “Be in peace with many: nevertheless have but ONE counseller of a thousand.” Ecclesiasticus 6:6 (Apocrypha).
The biggest mistake you can make when feeling overwhelmed or frustrated is to reach out on the fly to whomever you feel closest to and just start talking/venting. Nothing good comes from those conversations and guaranteed your words will come back to haunt you sooner or later.
When we are in obedience of the commandments, we are towers against death for our husbands and families. The tongue is the greatest weapon of all killing more than any sword (Ecclesiasticus 28:18 [Apocrypha]). Protect your homes and don’t let your seeking for help become a method that can ultimately destroy your home.
Help is here for you sisters, just get it the right way.